The First Look:

“Huh?!” and those other pressing questions

answered!

When I first began planning my wedding, I assumed I got the “gist” of the decisions I’d need to make throughout the process. Find a venue. Pick a date. Find a photographer, a florist, the DJ/band, a dress and so on and so forth. While all of those decisions certainly had to be made, there were all kinds of little and not so little – “incidentals” I didn’t anticipate needing to be decisive about.

One of the absolute biggest question needing answering was the matter of the First Look.

(Morgan and Ray, above, had suuuuuch a sweet first look. You can check out the action on their Love Story blog post!)

what is the first look?

The first look is a fairly modern concept as far as wedding traditions are concerned. Essentially, it’s a moment carved out of the busy day to see your betrothed on your wedding day prior to walking down the aisle. It’s the moment where you can forget all of the running around, the planning, the stressing and all of the other crazy and wonderful things that we experience in the run up to our wedding day, look into your almost-spouse’s eyes and let that “Oh holy cow, we’re getting married like……today!” feeling wash over you and truly soak in the excitement and magnitude of taking this big leap together. It’s a really powerful, intimate, often hilarious and always super sweet moment that an almost-married couple can enjoy together before away from the eyes of basically everyone they know.

To peek or not to peek?

We’ve all been to weddings where the ceremony was at 1pm and the reception didn’t start until 5pm so that the bridal party could do portraits between the two events.

Before Mark and I decided to make things official, I always swore I would never be the bride who would make folks wait around and twiddle their thumbs for a couple of hours before party time……until we actually started planning our wedding, of course.

I’m going to be really honest here: when Mark and I were planning our wedding, I wouldn’t even consider doing a first look. The tradition of seeing each other for the first time as I walked down the aisle was really important to me, which was something I hadn’t realized until planning the big day. My being very susceptible to superstition (“It’s bad luck for the groom to see the bride on your wedding day!”) more than likely played a hand in that….

But for all of you slightly less neurotic people out there, the first look is in a word, awesome. This is down to two basic truths:

one:it gives you a moment to breathe.

One thing that personally shocked me on my wedding day was how deeply uncool my demeanor was right before walking down the aisle. Again, since I’d historically never been chomping at the bit to be a bride, I assumed I’d be pretty chill prior to taking the plunge. Oh, Maura, Maura, Maura.

As I stood arm in arm with my dad in front of the church’s opaque glass doors…. I started full on trembling (I know, how very Jane Austen heroine-ess, right?).

It was embarrassing. I was like, “Dude. Pull yourself together. You have about 5 seconds”. It wasn’t due to the fact that I had had way too much caffeine and way too little food in the past 48 hours. It wasn’t because I thought for a second that I wasn’t doing the right thing.

It was all just too. Much. The adrenaline. The emotions. The fact that I was about to see, in tandem, our entire extended families and best friends from all over the world. The fact that I was about to see Mark for the first time on this crazy day. That I was entering these doors as a single woman and would exit through them married for Pete’s sake (that is just so grown up!).

You get the point. It was a whole heck of a lot going on at once. Had Mark and I had a first look and spent a little time together before the ceremony, my pre-stroll down the aisle nerves would have been reduced greatly.

The rest of the day was a whirlwind. Apart from our ride from the church to the reception venue, we virtually had no time together whatsoever. And I’m not complaining, I totally get it. Your reception is essentially a massive party you’re hosting and you want to/need to make sure you’re greeting all of the people lovely enough to want to celebrate this huge event with you. Mark and I spent most of the reception on opposite sides of the Armour House, thanking various people for coming. Ya know, shaking hands, kissing babies and the like. While our wedding was truly fabulous, one thing I wish we had made a little more time for was time spent together. A minute to say, “Hey buddy! What’s going on?” and let the awesomeness of what was going on truly soak in.

The one thing that really was amazing was the look on Mark’s face when the doors opened. That’s something that I certainly don’t regret the situation allowing for.

Side note: what a babe!

two:a first day will make your life so much easier.